Ouch! This review of Emdee's dates back to 2005, so don't take it as gospel for 2010, as things may well have changed since then. But enjoy the tale!


THE SEAFOOD DRAGON
This restaurant is located on Ratchaprarop Road, near the smelly Klong Saen Saep, obliquely opposite the World Trade Centre.

In a previous review I gave a positive recommendation to this establishment, however, I now want to retract those comments, as the place has changed markedly for the worse, in fact, I would go so far as to say that it is one of the most horrible restaurants I have had the misfortune to dine at in Bangkok for quite a number of years.

Obviously the locals knew a thing or two that we didn’t, as the night we dined there, only six other people were in attendance. Once upon a time this place used to pack the punters in, but not anymore.

We were ushered to a big round table with no tablecloth, and which had not even been wiped clean from the use of the immediately previous diners.

We were then presented with cold towels in a plastic wrap, which we undid and placed them on the table for removal along with the towels after we had used them.

While perusing the menu I ordered a large bottle of Heineken but my request was met with a blank stare. I repeated the request, but the waitress said: “You have Sing, yes?”
“No”, I replied, “I want a large bottle of Heineken”.

“You have Sing yes?”

There was a guy dressed in a dirty white shirt with a tie standing near the entrance who was trying to entice passers by into the restaurant, so I called him over and repeated the request.

“Only have Sing, sir”.

“OK” I replied, “One large Sing and a gin and tonic”.

“No gin and tonic”.

“Oh well, a Vodka and orange”.

“No vodka sir”.

By now I was becoming exasperated, so I asked “What do you have then?”

“Only Sing and Mekong (whisky)”.

I was astounded, so I asked for a bottle of green tea instead.

“Sorry sir, no green tea”.

“Well how about a bottle of water?”

“Yep, nam OK”.

That was our introduction to the Seafood Dragon. From there things got progressively worse.

We asked for the table to be wiped down, whereupon water was poured onto the table and a dirty linen cloth was used to clean the tabletop, leaving traces of water and the residual dirt of the cloth on the table.

The menus then appeared, with pictorials of the seafood on offer.

It soon became apparent that the seafood was amongst the most expensive in Bangkok. Phuket lobster was priced at 195 per 100 grams (almost double the Bangkok average), river prawns were 165 baht per 100 grams (Bangkok average 95 baht per 100 gr), and the scallops were priced at 75 baht per shell (Bangkok average 25 baht per shell).

After careful consideration we ordered an oyster omelette, and a dish consisting of prawns and noodles.

The oyster omelette was small, and I do mean small. I counted the molluscs in the egg mixture and I couldn’t get past 16. These are the miniature Asian oysters, not the big ones that most of you would associate with in Europe, America, Australia and NZ.

It was neither good or bad, just very tardy on the ingredients. There as was no sauce accompaniment, as there usually is, consisting of light soy, fish sauce, sesame oil and a little hoi sin.

The prawns and noodles dish was an absolute disgrace. The prawns, were not prawns, but miniature shrimps usually farmed and dried and used as a reconstituted shrimp in rice and other dishes.

There was not chance that the “plump prawn” syndrome was practiced at the Seafood Dragon, as the prawns were just too miniscule for any form of enchancement.

The noodles were of the dried variety, and reconstituted in hot water, before being added to the wok with the shrimps, and splashed with a particularly salty-tasing soy sauce.

The food, when it arrived, was literally dumped on the table, and the waitress then turned on her mobile phone and had an animated conversation whilst standing on the other side of the table.

The food and service were so appalling, that we decided not to finish the noodle dish, and instead asked the man in the dirty white shirt to get us the bill, as the waitress was still involved in a convoluted conversation with her boyfriend, if my limited knowledge of Thai is accurate.

When the bill did arrive after a few minutes, we were in for another surprise or two.

Listed on the bill, were the following items:
Towels 10 baht ea total 20
Use of china 20 baht ea total 40
Chopsticks 20 baht ea total 20
Cleaning of table 10 baht total 10
Service charge 10% total 65
VAT charge 7% total 45
The large bottle of Singha was 195 baht, the bottle of water 85 baht, the oyster omelette 195 baht, and the disgusting prawns dish came in at 220 baht, for a total of 895 baht.

This ugly meal, even at half the cost, would have been hideously expensive for what was presented in the guise of seafood cuisine.

At the conclusion of the meal, the plastic wrappings and the towels were still on the stable, the smears from the wipe down were still evident, and having to pay to have the table wiped down is surely a first for any restaurant anywhere.

As the man in the dirty white shirt came to collect our money, he noticed that I was writing notes into my travel diary. He returned with our change and another man, who introduced himself as Koon.

“You do eat notes?”

“Yes I do”.

“Who you write for?”

“A web site”.

“Good write for Seafood Dragon, yes”.

“No, it won’t be”.

“Uh”.

“You’re food is disgraceful, your service is disgraceful, your prices are outrageous, your hygiene is abominable”.

“No understand. You come back tomorrow, yes, have very free meal, give Seafood Dragon good write, yes”.

“No thank you,” and I won’t be recommending anyone else to come to this dump either”.

Loss of face; yes. Aggressive; yes. Truthful assertions; yes.

SUMMARY: Food 1/10; service 1/10; hygiene, 0/10; ambience 1/10; value for money 0/10. Score: 3/50.
All cards accepted. Kiddy friendly: Only if you like watching your kids eating overpriced ****.

VERDICT: This horrible restaurant does not deserve the patronage of any visitor to Bangkok, as it is obvious the locals have long given the place away. What was once a nice, good value for money restaurant is now nothing more than a complete dump, complementing the smelly klong adjacent to its address.

FOOTNOTE: When I mentioned our experience to the concierge at the apartment complex we were staying in, he said, “You should have asked me, I won’t send anyone there anymore. Too many bad experiences, charge too much, not nice, bad to eat there”.

Amen to that!!

__________________
Owner, travelforum.org
My latest travels: Shikoku Pilgrimage

This restaurant was closed for a while by the Thailand Health Department some time after this review. There was a serious outbreak of food poisoning.

About 18 months later following a number of "mishaps" the restaurant was acquired by a respected Bangkok restaurant-owning family. Amongst other restaurants operated by this extended family is a very popular seafood outlet on Sukhumvit Road, near the Asoke BTS.

I haven't ventured back to this restaurant since that terrible experience outlined above, but this is to let forum members know that it is now probably "safe" to dine there given the good reputation of the present owners.